Baby Steps

Today I am thinking about what it is like to live in all or nothing world.  A world where we want to make thing happen now.  Instant is the key to everything lately.. but is it really better?  I have found that what is gained easily is not appreciated enough and often lost just as easily.  In the past I have said that I am going to accomplish something, like lose a few pounds, and I have a tendency to be really strict with myself for a week or two then I slack off.  The problem is I am looking at the end result.  I am trying to accomplish the goal as quickly as possible with an all or nothing attitude.  I have learned that the real practice is in the everyday, little choices we make.  If we break things down in to smaller steps, day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute…then we are more likely to make wiser choices.

If you make a bad choice in the morning it doesn’t mean that your day is already ruined so just keep making the same bad choices.  If you are falling down the stairs you don’t shrug and say…might as well keep falling…you try and stop the fall! Every wise choice made adds up.  Every minute of exercise instead of sitting on the couch, every sip of water instead of a soda, every positive thought…they all add up!  Those baby steps in life are what eventually add up to making a really rewarding life.  We usually don’t become a drug addict, obese, or cheat overnight….there are little choices made over and over that lead us to those results.  Those repeated bad choices add up to being an addict or obese or cheating on someone you love, or any of the other many bad situations in life.  Every day we are faced with thousands of little choices that map out what the future may hold for us.  The choices we are making right now, in this very moment, are what will shape our future.

What are you thinking right now?  Are you being a positive person today?  Are you being thankful for what you have and where you are in life?  Are you being helpful and kind to those around you? Have you let those you love know it?  Every day we should strive to be the best we can be and it all starts with the little things.  Choose to read books or have relationships that teach you something and add to your life in a positive way. Are the people, places, things, activities that you surround yourself with making your life better or do you feel stressed, sick, and tired?  Those people, places and things are not to blame…YOU are.  Take responsibility for your choices and if you are not happy, then have the courage to make the changes necessary to get where you want to be in life.  It is okay to love a friend dearly but admit that you have outgrown them.  You don’t owe anybody anything in life and if they make you believe you do then they are not good for you.  Life is about growth and learning and helping others learn and grow as well. A good relationship will encourage you to grow to your highest level even if it means moving on from them.

I would like to introduce you to a very wise man that I often listen to and he gives great perspective on many things in life…Jay Shetty.  If you have a chance please follow him on YouTube.  He will open your eyes to a wonderful way of thinking.  The following video relates to my post today…ENJOY!

 

 

With love, health, and happiness

Stacy

Choices versus Excuses

The ability to remain calm and look for the positive in all situations takes practice.  Being the mother of a newly driving 16-year-old and taking care of remodeling projects on my home along with holding down a full time job and full time college can be a bit overwhelming if I allow it to be.  What it comes down to is, choices.  I have observed friends who make excuses for why they can’t do something they say they want to do, but I think we all know… if you really want something bad enough you will make it happen.  I have been guilty of making excuses in my life but as I get older I try to ask myself, why?  Why am I really making these excuses?

Recently my daughter invited friends to go with her on a last minute hiking trip planned by her Dad and Stepmom.  She came to me the night before complaining that every friend she invited was giving her a lame excuse instead of being honest with her.  She discovered one friend was hanging out with another person that weekend but instead of being honest and telling my daughter she was hanging out someone else she simply said that her Dad said no.  Why?  Why not take responsibility for your choice?  If you are really the friend that you think you are then you should be able to be honest and tell your friend that you have other plans or simply do not feel like going.  Why lie?  We lie to ourselves all the time as well…

I hear friends say they want to go back to school and then give a laundry list of reasons why they can’t.  Usually I can argue with every reason they give and the truth is, they just don’t want it bad enough.  I spoke of going back to school often and I remember there were many excuses and one day I just stopped making excuses and went for it.  I am so glad I did because I never looked back!  Our office has a weight loss program and I often see women who talk about the many programs they have tried and how none of them seem to work.  I hate to break it to you ladies but EVERY diet program can work…its your choice to follow it and do the work to make it work.  If you wait for the time to be right then you will never do it because there will always be an excuse to grasp on to!

Falling in love doesn’t just happen, it is a choice.  Staying faithful doesn’t just happen, it is a choice.  Being unfaithful is a choice also…it doesn’t just happen like so many caught cheaters claim.  Going to school and making the grades does not just happen, it is a choice.  Having a baby does not just happen by accident either…somewhere along the way some choices were made.  You didn’t get a speeding ticket because of bad luck …you made a choice.  You did not gain 50 extra pounds without making a few choices along the way.  So stop making excuses and accept the fact that you made some unwise choices or just chose not to act at all and now it is time to take responsibility.

This comes back to an earlier post I made called, Just Ask It.  When making a choice in life ask yourself, what is the wise thing for me do?  If you have a chance please take the time to watch the video series of Just Ask It because it is full of helpful information.  Having a happy and fulfilling life starts with accepting responsibility for the life we have chose to lead so far and stop making excuses.  Then choosing to learn from those choices so that you can move forward and make wiser choices in the future.

With the conscious choice of happiness, health, and big love,

Stacy

Giving Without Expectation

I just returned from a wonderful and very relaxing week in Panama City Beach.  The next morning I decided to head to the store to restock my refrigerator  before my daughter returned home.  I arrived in the parking lot of the grocery store and as I got out of my car I heard this yowling and realized there was a cat inside my car.  After a couple of people in the parking lot looked under my hood with me, without any luck, I decided to drive across the street to the closest vets office.  When I arrived the office was not open yet but a man waiting with his dog offered to help me.  He was able to retrieve a small but very wild kitten from inside the bumper of my little Honda Civic.  I proceeded to have the kitten checked out by the vet, given flea meds and boxed up to be taken home with me.  I already have a happy cat and dog at home so I admit I was bit hesitant to mess up the perfect balance of my household by adding a wild kitten.

My daughter came home early from her Dads to see me and help with the new kitten.  Our goal was to get it tamed down enough to take her to my regular vet for a shots and other tests.  We left the kitten in the guest bathroom with food, water, and a small crate to sleep in and by the next day she was nervously letting us hold and pet her.  So we left for the day to go to church and then to a gathering with friends.  We arrived home later that evening to hear the kitten crying non-stop and in a panic.  My daughter ran inside the bathroom to see the kitten had tried to climb our cabinets in the bathroom and caught its paw in the hinges and was just hanging there! We had no idea for how long!  We helped the kitten down, added ice to her paw and I decided to take her to the vet the next morning instead of waiting until her regularly scheduled appointment.

Might I mention, when the kitten was removed from the car the seal underneath my fender was not snapped in completely and on the way to church the next morning the seal got caught by the wind and popped out, rubbing on the road and tire and it tore it up pretty bad.  I had to make a quick stop at an automotive center where they graciously zip-tied the bottom of my car up for free and sent me on my way.  So needless to say, by the time I took this kitten to the vet the next morning I was feeling a bit frustrated by all the trouble this little kitten had caused me already.  Sadly, the kitten seemed to have severe nerve damage to her front paw from getting hung up in the cabinet and at this point we are just waiting it out to see if the leg will have to be removed.  We have one week to see if the leg regains feeling and we are hoping she will be able to walk on it normally.  Right now she seems to just drag it around, limping, but does not seem to be in pain.  Between the caring for the kitten, my car, and the vet bill, I found myself wondering what the universe was trying to teach me in all of this.

There was a moment, when my car tore up on the way to church, I said to my daughter, why is the universe punishing for being a good person?  Shouldn’t I be finding a $100 bill on the sidewalk instead?  After I asked those questions I started thinking about karma and expectations.  When we do something good for another person, or creature of God,we should do it out of the kindness of our hearts, without expectation of anything in return.  This comes back to my previous post about unconditional love.  So I took a step back from the situation and asked myself, what is the wise thing to do in this situation and what is the best lesson to learn?

I debated on if I should keep the kitten and I have decided that I will do my best to give this kitten the best life possible because she has obviously been through enough already. My daughter and I decided to name the cute little grey and white kitten Lavender.  We kept her swaddled in a blanket when we first held her because she was so wild, but I was able to get a picture of her sweet face.

When we witness someone or something that needs help we should act out of love without expectation.  If we give money to a person and they do not spend it wisely, then that is on their heart and not ours.  We still must act from a place of love and not judgement.  Everyone is here to learn and grow and help the world become a better place….one kitten at a time.

Yours with love, health and happiness

Stacy